Kid Rock Takes a Dump on Ford: “That Ain’t Even A Real Truck”

Kid Rock sure does know how to get a crowd going. During his last performance at West Tallahassee’s famed Spartacus Club, Kid dropped a bomb on “woke” Ford:

“That stupid gay rainbow thing? That Ain’t even a real truck.” The big screen then showed Kid next to his massive GMC Silverado, which is definitely not at all gay.

Oh boy did the crowd go wild Kid busted into an a cappella version of Bomb-Ditty-Ditty-Bomb Song while the crowd chanted “Let’s go Branden!!!”

Kid then sent the crowd into a frenzy when he had an actual rainbow-colored Ford brought onto the stage so he could take a dump on it live. They covered the act with a screen, but when it came up, there was a fresh steaming pile.

It was a truly magical night for everyone there. “I’ll never forget it,” said Steve Ashbaucher, “I’m gonna have to change my shorts I got so excited.”

That’s how lots of his shows go, according to a group of seemingly ill-adjusted to society men who follow him around from venue to venue running the secret meth and male prostitution ring that keeps these things selling out in rural America.

“Unlike these woke companies,” explained Kid’s manager, Joe Barron, “Kid knows his base. He understands their needs and issues clean needles and fresh pipes at all of his shows for a premium price. He also has Narcan on hand, but only for those who work and can afford it.”

Kid Rock is a great American, patriots. His efforts to own the libs are becoming legendary. God Bless the USA.

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